✨ Perimenopause Power Moves: Transform Your Hormones and Health!✨
Grab your free guide & recipes today!
👉 Download Now!

5 Things Your Best Friend Might Be Embarrassed to Tell You About Perimenopause (But Really Shouldn't Be)

“Acceptance Is Sexy On the days when your eyes don’t feel like they did when you were twenty-five, look into them and tell yourself you are still right here. Because you are. Our hormones make us forget this sometimes. But it’s a lie. It is a privilege to live to the age you are now—accept that every day, you are younger than you’ll ever be, and allow it to give you power.” ~ Tamsen Fadal, How to Menopause: Take Charge of Your Health, Reclaim Your Life, and Feel Even Better than Before

Perimenopause symptoms can feel like a secret club nobody warned you about—and membership comes with some seriously strange perks.

Your best friend might be acting a little different lately—more emotional, more exhausted, maybe even a little more forgetful—but odds are, she’s going through some powerful biological changes she's too embarrassed to bring up.

Good news: You’re not imagining it. And neither is she.

According to the North American Menopause Society, perimenopause can start as early as your mid-30s and last up to 10 years. During this phase, fluctuating levels of estrogen, progesterone, testosterone, and even cortisol wreak havoc on body systems far beyond reproduction—including mood, sleep, brain function, metabolism, and even heart health.

It’s messy. It's misunderstood.

And it’s 100% normal.

So let's break the silence. Here are 5 very real things your bestie might be struggling with—and why it's time we normalize the conversation.

1. Her Periods Have Gone Completely Off the Rails

One month, she’s soaking a super tampon every hour; the next, she’s wondering if her period ghosted her for good.

Here’s why: During perimenopause, ovulation becomes less predictable. This erratic ovulation causes wide fluctuations in estrogen and progesterone—leading to heavier bleeding (estrogen dominance), skipped periods (no ovulation), shorter cycles, or spotting.

🔬 Science note: Estrogen stimulates the uterine lining to build up. Without the counterbalance of steady progesterone, the lining can grow excessively thick—leading to heavier, clotty periods.

✅ Pro tip: Tracking symptoms can help identify patterns—and help her advocate for treatment if things feel extreme (like anemia risk from heavy bleeding).

2. Her Mood Swings Could Give You Whiplash (And It's Not Her Fault)

If she bursts into tears over a dog food commercial, then snaps at you over brunch plans—trust me, she’s not doing it on purpose.

Mood swings during perimenopause are directly tied to neurochemical shifts triggered by fluctuating estrogen. Estrogen affects serotonin, dopamine, and norepinephrine—neurotransmitters responsible for happiness, motivation, and emotional stability.

🔬 Science note: Studies show that declining estrogen levels during midlife correlate with increased rates of depression, anxiety, and irritability—especially in women with a personal or family history of mood disorders.

✅ Pro tip: Lifestyle habits like regular exercise, sleep hygiene, and even mindfulness meditation can boost serotonin naturally. In some cases, hormone therapy or antidepressants may be recommended.

3. Her Sex Life Feels Like It’s Hit a Brick Wall (and It’s Breaking Her Heart)

Vaginal dryness. Low libido. Painful intimacy.

She might be too embarrassed to tell you—but behind closed doors, these issues are very real and incredibly common.

Here’s why: Estrogen maintains the elasticity, blood flow, and moisture of vaginal tissues. As estrogen declines, tissues become thinner, drier, and more fragile—a condition known as genitourinary syndrome of menopause (GSM).

🔬 Science note: GSM affects up to 50% of women during perimenopause and beyond, but it's often underdiagnosed because of the stigma around discussing sexual health.

✅ Pro tip: Vaginal moisturizers, lubricants, and localized estrogen therapy can dramatically improve comfort and restore intimacy. (And open conversations with partners can help too!)

4. She's Struggling With Fatigue, Brain Fog, and Feeling “Off” — and It’s Not Laziness

She’s double-checking the oven 12 times. She’s forgetting simple words. She’s waking up exhausted despite sleeping all night (when she can sleep).

Fatigue and brain fog during perimenopause are legitimately biological.

🔬 Science note: Estrogen plays a critical role in brain energy metabolism. Studies show that declining estrogen reduces the brain’s ability to efficiently use glucose (its primary fuel source), leading to mental fog, slower thinking, and fatigue. Plus, sleep disturbances triggered by night sweats and anxiety make it even harder to recharge.

✅ Pro tip: Eating balanced meals (especially with protein, healthy fats, and fiber), moving the body daily, and addressing sleep hygiene can help fuel the brain better. In some cases, cognitive therapies or hormone support might be recommended.

5. She Sometimes Wonders If She’s Actually Losing Her Mind (But She’s Really Just Transforming)

Between unpredictable moods, sleep issues, weight gain, memory lapses, and weird body symptoms, it's no wonder women in perimenopause sometimes fear they're "losing it."

But the truth is far more empowering.

🔬 Science note: Research from neuroscientist Dr. Lisa Mosconi shows that hormonal transitions in midlife don't damage the brain—they remodel it. Brain regions responsible for memory, social cognition, and emotional regulation are being rewired for midlife adaptation. Yes, the process feels messy—but it's setting the stage for a more resilient, wise, emotionally grounded you.

✅ Pro tip: Instead of viewing symptoms as decline, reframing them as part of a powerful brain transformation can help women feel more in control and hopeful.

Final Thoughts: Talk About It. Normalize It. Own It.

Perimenopause is not just about periods ending—it’s about whole-body transformation.
The more we open up about the messy, beautiful truth of this stage, the more we empower each other to seek support, get solutions, and ditch the shame once and for all.

So next time your best friend says something like, “I feel crazy," or "I don’t feel like myself," offer her a hug, a cup of tea, and the biggest truth bomb you can:

You’re not crazy. You’re evolving. And you’re not alone.

✨ Together, we’re rewriting the perimenopause story—with compassion, humor, and a whole lot of sisterhood.

Hormonally yours,

Kimberlee Erin

Just a heads-up: I’m a Certified Menopause Coaching Specialist and Holistic Nutritionist, and while I love sharing what’s worked for me and my clients, this blog is for informational purposes only. It’s not a substitute for medical advice. Always check in with your healthcare provider before starting new supplements, hormones, or treatments—especially since every woman’s perimenopause journey is different. You deserve personalized care that truly fits you.